Menopause Stinks! But It’s A Good Time To Take Stock…

“There’s a fine line between courage and foolishness. Too bad it’s not a fence”

I love this quote! When your children grow up and take bold, and sometimes foolish steps we can only stand back and let them make mistakes. But occasionally a miracle follows and it turns out, not only all right, but fantastic!

Being confident in your mothering (ok guys your ‘parenting’) takes courage every day. When decisions are taken that any mother would know would spell disaster, or at the very least, hard times, it takes courage to let it happen and let the lessons be learned without maternal interference.

As I am aware of my own maternal struggles, I realise what my own mother must have gone through. When I was just pregnant with my elder son, my husband and I made the decision to leave the security of a well-to-do family in Dublin and come to Australia with only $50 in our joint pocket. What??! Are you mad, Maura?!

My poor mother sobbed when I left. It was dark, it was cold and I had to leave when it was pouring rain. I thought Mum was crying because I was leaving but I know now she was crying for that reason and the frustration of looking at my awful decision!

But miracles do happen. I was happy to be going to explore the other side of the world. I had already been to Africa and I felt confident coming to Australia, even though I barely made it off the boat when my son arrived! But Australia has been good to me. I love this sunburnt country, so much that I felt that I could kiss the ground when the ship docked. Alas, too fat with pregnancy so my husband was spared the embarrassment!

Once you have responsibility for another human you find all your other reference points fade away. Now the baby-child-teenager and then adult, remain your focus. That is until menopause when we were meant to take stock, let go and sort ourselves out first. At this time of life, it is not only a good thing for a woman, but a good thing for the entire family, for her to take better care of herself at last.

Grannies are so valuable! Those of us that are not grandmothers yet so envy the others whose feet are being tripped up by tiny little persons. The lessons we can offer are only possible if we have the wisdom to let the little ones develop confidence and courage to take steps backward as well as forward.

Sometimes it takes courage just to face another day. Lots of women live lives ‘of quiet desperation’. Giving another person a smile can make the difference in a person’s day. But you can sometimes baulk at a major change at this time of life, mainly because we realise how things can turn pear-shaped. But take a firm hold on your confidence and just do it!

It is better to make the decision yourself rather than have a decision forced on you by someone else.if you are a natural procrastinator, remember the man who never made a mistake, never made anything. I look at my unfinished projects and shiver with guilt that they are still there, looking at me. But what if I make the decision not to finish them? Does that make me feel better or worse?

Resolving problems comes easier to some personality types. But others delay decisions until they are forced by circumstances to go one way or another. That’s ‘management by crisis’!  My ex-husband was so good in a crisis that he unconsciously let things go until there actually was a crisis and he could shine! Boring old preventive me was appalled!

It was a bold move to divorce and make a life for myself, but again miracles do happen. Now I have a good professional reputation and do interesting work, have two wondrous sons and friends galore. If only Mother could see me now…

Life Is Chaotic at Present!

Hey! My cleaner is leaving after 9-10 years’ faithful service; my PA is leaving (but not yet) to develop her own business; husband gone long ago, lawyer son is joining my business (as well as developing his own practice part-time); Melbourne son planning a family at last, so life is FULL of change right now. But am I panicking?? Well, not much, considering the upheaval.

I’m such a simple soul with technology that the only way I can keep track of all my various jobs/appointments outside the clinic is to write LARGE letters and dates across the top of pages in date order on the top of my desk!! Otherwise chaos is likely to prevail. Hidden diaries inside computers are the most dangerous as I have a visual memory and if I haven’t seen the date written LARGE as I pass by, I won’t recall that there is anything on and am as likely to be out seeing friends.

Which leads me to wonder whether the faint feeling of having forgotten something today is causing a general feeling of anxiety in our work-torn world. Not just me, but everyone? Maybe others are 3-4 times as smart as me and don’t forget to consult the hidden diary in the computer/phone/iPad etc. But I recall missing a court date when I was a young lawyer which made me fear the terror of such a thing ever happening again. Missing court dates is enough to get you not only fired, but disbarred, in American parlance. Luckily that situation could be redeemed but only just.

Upheaval and excessive events are a known cause of stress. There is even a table of ‘stressors’ that you can download. Each event has a stress value and there are some positive stressors as well as negative. For instance, death (other’s, not your own) rates about 10 points and divorce rates 11. Death of a child rates about 15 or so but marriage and a new job also rate about 8-10. I have stopped taking the test as the last time I did it I rated over 40 (well over 40), which was the maximum, equalling close to being admitted to the funny farm.

Ambient stress such as I am now going through, is OK if you remember to stop more and more things closing in. If more and more does close in beyond your control, you really have to just stop everything. And breathe. And plan the order of things to be done.

It takes time to process many different sorts of things at once. When I was younger, I had a medical practice, studied law, ran a teenage family, was the primary bread winner, and played bridge, went camping and basically enjoyed my life. When I was asked how I did it (memo to self tonight: this should be remembered and applied right now) I said I just thought of the tasks as part of one job i.e. my life. Just as women all over the world think about children, food, cleaning, husbands, travel and solving homework, they are all part of one job, raising a family. Well, my problems now are all part of one job: surviving my life!

In many ways the clinic practice is light relief. I can’t think of anything else as I concentrate on the patients and I don’t take phone calls from outsiders during the consultation, so there is caa-aa-alm. But as soon as I step outside into the corridor or to go to the…. tea-room, they pounce. Either receptionists, nurses, colleagues, other patients, or (God Help Me) reps from pharmaceutical companies. Nice people themselves with a dreadful job to do so I try not to be too rude!

So what message can I give you from all this?

  • Be patient if I seem rattled!
  • Use my website emails only for seminar details etc, not your own hormones or clinical problems
  • Find me another PA before the end of May!
  • Allow me to go on holiday in August-September, I will need it!
  • Tell me if you don’t get this blog.      (WAIT a minute! How can you know if you don’t get it?? OK, so you can take the girl out of Ireland, but you can’t get Ireland out of the girl!

Be good!

Tell Me, If You Can, Who Or What Is God?

Maybe you think this question is out of date, or sectarian, or irrelevant? Think again. It appears that what we believe affects every decision of our lives, down to which brand of toilet paper we buy, or which light globe.

I came across this oddity, a fairly fundamental oddity perhaps, while I was talking to a patient this week. He believed that he had been most unfortunate, most unlucky, more than anyone else he had ever heard of, because he had a list of ills that had befallen him. He did not believe in life after death, in God or in Nature, the Universe or anything. “When you’re dead, you’re dead, mate!” he said.

The other patient that I saw this week was in fact most unfortunate. She had a list of ills three times the length and seriousness of the first patient. She was less disturbed, more hopeful and more enthusiastic than she might have been, but she believed in Something Out There looking after her. So she lived every day as if she would live forever. She bought good quality fair trade coffee and re-cycled toilet paper. She volunteered at the Op shop 2 hours a week, she managed on a pension that is so small it hardly qualifies for the term.  She believed in playing fair with the world around her, blaming no one for her problems but happily meeting each challenge as it arose. Because she believed. I don’t know whether she went to any church and it doesn’t matter.

It is not important what she believed in, but the fact that she had faith in what would be good for her coming around when it was due.

Such belief creates the world we live in. We can muddle along in misery never knowing whether we will live til next Christmas, never hearing anyone say they love us, never having a hand to hold or an ear to tell out troubles to. But if, like the lady I mentioned, we can trust, we can survive.

I too believe in Something Out There. Some days I am mesmerised by Nature in full glory; other days it is the cloud patterns in the sky; sometimes it is the sheer gratitude for the life I have and the friends I love. I too believe that things will work out well. If the doom-sayers want to bring me down, well, I don’t listen.

The more sensible amongst my friends have told me their sage counsel in the past, and even in the present, but although I take care, I don’t fret (well, not too often!) and if God, the Universe and Everything is still there looking after me, then things will be OK, one way or another.

God as an elderly gentleman with a need for praise and buttering-up is for children. Paint him as a happy but stern grandfather and little ones will pay more attention. But adults need to make their own decisions about God. Even if they reject the paternal image and the whole religious performance, they will need at some time or other to decide whether they have something to believe in or not. Sad is the man or woman with nothing and no one to trust to make things right. So often if we just honour the enormity and power of the energy of the universe, we will be standing in awe of the Divine Something. That’s all it takes. Then we can relax, knowing that whatever happens is going to be for the best.

Then we can be like the woman with nothing, who actually has everything.

Some ancients believed in the spirit of each rock and flower. Have you read The Findhorn Garden? It’s a good example of that, and it shows its power.

Some believe in God and St Mary McKillop. Have you read her story? It’s a good example of that.

Some believe in Spiritualism, that the spirits of dead loved ones can help from Heaven. The Spiritualist Churches are good examples of that.

Some believe in Jesus Christ or in Mahommed or Sai Baba or even in themselves as a powerful creator. The secret is……. They are all right!! The power comes from the BELIEF, not from the target of the adoration.

But if you believe in random life and death and random misery or happiness, then that’s what you get, Random Misery or Happiness. How people would join you if you set up a support group or a Church of Random Misery or Happiness? None.

The most important thing in life, more than self-respect, more than wealth, more than friends or love itself, is TRUST that things will turn out well.

What you think you create,

What you feel, you attract,

What you imagine, will be.

We are going to explore some more of these things, as well as naturally effective hormones and the mind-body connection when we meet in May. The ways to find trust, the way to treat yourself and those around you so as to maximise your health and happiness, the way to believe in meeting and knowing the people you need to meet and know, will be explored. Natural remedies are given to us by Nature (God, the Universe, Whatever) and we need to see, admire and use them and be happy and grateful.

Blessings to you all.

Maura

PS  Be with us on May 26-27 in Mudgeeraba, Queensland. Call Liz on 0431 122 090  if you want to know more. But hurry, my house is not that big, I can only take about 20 and there are 12 booked already!

Is this the turning point?

What if August were the month that marked the turning point in your life? If this sounds good to you- come out from behind that computer & join me next week.

Come and experience with me the ultimate day out, an event that encompasses the four pillars of health – 4 specialists in one room sharing their expertise:

1) shed the weight
2) cook up a delicious healthy feast
3) manage your hormones effectively and naturally
4) add hours to your day by nourishing the mind and spirit

You will learn how to increase your energy, enhance your sleep, eliminate the hot flushes and improve your sex life. If you feel like you’ve tried everything when it comes to your health and up until now it’s been too hard and too much of a struggle, you are not alone.

Enjoy a wholistic approach to your optimum health.

SATURDAY 20th August

9am – 12 noon

Cost is $15

Prana Conference Centre, 7027 Nerang-Southport Road, Nerang (right next door to Fenix Fitness Nerang).

Contact me on 0431 122 090 or liz@drmauramcgill.com

Introducing Your Speakers

Myself, Dr Maura McGill.  Having spent the last 40 years as a practitioner specialising in treating women who have hit menopause with overwhelming symptoms like sleep deprivation, loss of libido, night sweats, hot flushes & moodiness I will share with you;

• Why women absolutely MUST NOT fall into the trap of getting potentially dangerous treatment before fully understanding their condition
• The 3 tests most GPs won’t do, that could mean you’re missing the full picture of what’s going on in your body and be taking the wrong Hormone Replacement Therapy
• Why you may need more than Hormone Replacement Therapy
• The difference between Synthetic (HRT) Hormones & Bio-Identical (Natural) Hormones and the risks associated with both
• How to Find a GP who prescribes natural hormones

My passion & purpose is to show you how to manage your menopause 100% naturally, in a tailored & specific way taking you from tired, miserable & frustrated to joyful, relaxed & sexy.

Ronaldo Fulieri from Nutri Food is passionate about teaching millions of people healthy ways of cooking. He believes in GOOD FOOD for a GOOD LIFE.

“ When I created Nutrifood Health Cooking Classes my focus was on people that have had health challenges in the past like myself, & who want to change for the better. Today my mission is to teach them to look for better alternatives of eating & living”.

Ronaldo is a gorgeous Brazillian dynamo who will be entertaining us & demonstrating his incredible cooking skills for us on the day. With food responsible for 70% of fat loss his very simple mission is to increase people’s quality of life & health through simple & easy cooking ideas.

Caroline Broomfield holds a certificate III & IV in Fitness, is a Certified Boxing Instructor & has an Advanced Certificate in Nutrition. With a proven system & training method, through her exercise & nutrition program Caroline will guarantee you incredible results.

Having experienced the negativity of being overweight herself Caroline understands the challenges of taking the first step to getting fit & losing weight sensibly. Specialising in helping women in midlife, you will discover just how EASY it is to change your lifestyle saving you from the daily pain of being unhappy, unhealthy & over-weight.

As passionate as you are about your reaching your fitness & lifestyle goal, Caroline will motivate & inspire you in an environment where wellness goals are heard, nurtured & implemented to produce lifetime results.

Caroline will be sharing with you her own amazing story & showing you how you can maximize your workout efficiency, improve your fitness, increase your stamina & develop an overall sense of well being.

Tameka Hilder food is a transformational Life Coach & holistic health coach who assists her clients in removing the emotional & psychological blocks preventing them from accessing their greatest potential.

“Our body is a reflection of not only what we eat, but what we think and how we feel” Tameka says.

Having healed herself from weight, food & health challenge’s Tameka has developed a permanent weight loss solution called Think Your Body Slim which helps you understand what is blocking your permanent weight loss be it on a physical, mental, emotional or spiritual level. Tamika is an expert on the mind-body connection and the psychology of weight loss. She will help you to understand how your mind is controlling your behaviours around food and exercise and how your mind is controlling your biology; your body weight.

I’m thrilled to be sharing this information with you and really looking forward to seeing you there.

Maura :)

PS Those details again are SATURDAY 20th August, 9am – 12 noon, Cost is $15

Prana Conference Centre, 7027 Nerang-Southport Road, Nerang (right next door to Fenix Fitness Nerang).

Contact me on 0431 122 090 or liz@drmauramcgill.com

Book now as seats are limited!!

Hot Flushes are the Single Most Powerful Reason GP’s reach for HRT!

The most troublesome symptom of menopause has to be hot flushes. They cause an amazing amount of personal discomfort, embarrassment and loss of sleep, not to mention the effect on our libido and sex lives!  Women complain to me all the time of having to fan their face, change their clothes, and even bedclothes, and they also find that they are subject to prejudice at work and socially  as a result of the ” ageism” that those women experience while suffering menopause.

Hot flushes are also the single most powerful reason that ordinary GPs reach for the usual synthetic HRT, which is mainly estrogen.  We know that in most cases the hot flushes will respond to the estrogen and will go away. One happy patient and one relieved GP? When a GP has a pill that he or she knows will help this tearful, anxious woman in front of you who is so distressed she is almost suicidal, it requires a great deal of self confidence on the part of the doctor not to reach for the easiest pill. And especially if the doctor has never had any information about hormones generally, or natural hormones in particular.

I say all this so you can understand why a normal GP, exposed only to pharmaceutical company propaganda, might think there is nothing else available other than synthetic HRT. And why a normal GP reaches for the estrogen to help this poor woman in front of him/her.

The answer is to dig deeper and use the most natural hormones possible to correct her symptoms.

Trouble follows if there is no further investigation! What is the true hormone picture here? Just how high or low is the FSH? How do we know whether there has been any other hormones active at the same time eg progesterone? Is the balance correct? Have the testosterone and its precursor (DHEA) been measured? As you can see the assumption of a low estrogen alone does not complete the diagnosis, just as the finding of a high blood sugar just once does not justify a diagnosis of diabetes. Much more investigation is required.

Also, the relief of the hot flushes, while wonderful, will soon throw up the other symptoms of menopause, for which estrogen is no help whatever!

 

So why do women stay on HRT for so many years? Partly it is because when estrogen was discovered it was thought to be a sort of ‘youth serum’ and women flocked to their doctors, not only to get relief of their hot flushes, but to get access to the hormone that exists in abundance in young women. Trying to tell those women that they are at risk is hard when they have convinced themselves over ten years or more that they are staying young!

The best practice guidelines say that five years of oestrogen after menopause starts is the limit. This is because the evidence of stroke, dementia and cancer starts to really build up after five years. But will the hot flushes come back? No, not if you have been balancing the estrogen with progesterone, because by five years, two things will have happened: the progesterone will have taken over that role and the estrogen receptor sites will have ‘calmed down’ so to speak, so that women in their 60s are not flushing for hormonal reasons, but usually for other reasons.

How do you manage a woman of, say, 68 who is still having hot flushes?

Well, the first thing is to take a careful and detailed history of when the flushes arise, what food or drink she has had, what exercise she has had that day. Then she needs to come off all hormones for two weeks and then have a full profile of her sex hormones done, together with a 3-hour glucose tolerance test. If that test shows that she has a drop at the third hour below her fasting level, she will also need her insulin levels done. In most cases there will be found a problem unrelated to her sex hormones, but being masked by the estrogen she has been taking.

What about young women and estrogen? The estrogen level in young women varies enormously during her menstrual cycle, but young women do not suffer hot flushes because the drop in estrogen is only temporary. Young women in our community are actually exposed to fairly significant amounts of oestrogen from preservatives, pesticides and plastics, not to mention hormones found in meat and chicken! All of these xeno- estrogen’s cause a build upon estrogen and if she has a shortage of progesterone to balance it, she will quickly complain of headaches, fatigue, bloating and a host of other general non-specific symptoms. Most of these symptoms resolve once the proper balance of estrogen and progesterone is achieved.

Young women on the contraceptive pill will complain also of headaches and other more vague symptoms. The contraceptive pill has been a gift to womankind by freeing them from the prison of unwanted and recurrent motherhood. But the hormones involved are not the same as our own hormones and when pregnancy is definitely finished with, a young woman would be well advised to get his or her tubes ‘done’ and get off the synthetic hormones that are in the Pill, rather than spending 10-15-20 years on a drug like the Pill waiting for menopause!

The Pill is often prescribed by GPs for women at menopause. The rationale seems to be: she is short of estrogen now, she has had years of the Pill without I’ll effects, and the contraceptive function is an added benefit. But to those women I say, do not agree to take another 5-10-15 years of the Pill when you can take natural hormones and feel better without the risks of the synthetics.